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I got all my sisters………. brothers, granny, grandad, aunties, uncles, cousins……..Families can be complicated! You might have a small family or there could be loads of you! Whatever your situation, family relationships can be difficult at times. Now you might be thinking, "what's this got to do with careers and learning?" Well, as we've said in many other articles, anything to do with your life can affect the choices you take, the decisions make and the learning and planning you need to get where you want to get. |
This article isn't trying to point out how strange your family is, or that
you have a bad family because you have problems. It is quite likely that most
families will have a difficult time at some point….and this would make
you quite 'normal' (whatever that is!)!!! It's not something to feel embarrassed
about. It is just good to know where YOU can get help and information, if you
need it. Families can often be the one place you want to turn to for advice,
help and guidance (After all, they always seem to be there!). If there are lots
of other things going on, it can leave you feeling a little bit lost, so here
are some examples of the help available.
It's hard to describe family life in one or two words, because everybody's
family is different. Some young people might find certain types of problem much
easier to deal with than others, depending on yourselves, your families and
what's going on in your lives at the time.
For example, if your mum and dad are splitting up, this can be a really difficult
time for everyone. There may be lots of arguments or upset (although this doesn't
always happen). You might feel that there was something you could have done
to stop it happening and often there is lots of unhappiness about two of the
most important people in your life. Sometimes, it might be difficult to talk
to either of your parents about your feelings. If you feel that that you can't
talk to them, it is important that you talk to someone if you need to. You might
just need some personal time and space to get things off your chest. There are
lots of websites with information that you might find helpful and you can also
talk to your connexions adviser or connexions direct. It might just be that
you want to ask some questions about 'Divorce' and 'Proceedings' and other things
and 'big words' that you are not sure about.
www.itsnotyourfault.org/html/teen/vimportantthings.htm.
Being a teenager is usually quite stressful. I won't sit and write about how you are feeling, because when you are a teenager, it is very annoying when adults do that! But there may be lots of everyday things with your family, which are just getting you down. Sharing bedrooms with brothers or sisters, younger family members watching TV at top volume when you are trying to write an English essay, or simply being nagged day in and day out about being mature, thinking about you future and doing well! All with good intention, but difficult when you're already stressing about your exams! Now all parents are different but if you are feeling the pressure, try not to scream at them and try telling them how stressed you are feeling. This might help them to understand and back off a bit! If this doesn't work, try having a chat with another family member or your connexions adviser for some advice. Whatever the arguments are about, or however much you are convinced that your parents are from a different planet, talking to them or talking to someone else helps you to calm down and explain how YOU are feeling!.
Unfortunately there is no book to tell you how everything is going to work
out and what is going to happen with your family. You just have to try and deal
with each thing as it comes up. Just remember to try and take some time out
before exploding and get some advice from others if you need to talk about it!
Don't feel alone and remember that help is available, whatever the situation.
Good luck
Jennie Glitherow
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