Careers Gateway - Magazine

Relationships! It's a very complicated business!

Whether it's girlfriends, boyfriends, parents, teachers, friends or neighbours, getting along (or not) with people seems to take up a lot of time.

Are you fed up of hearing advice such as 'there are plenty more fish in the sea' or 'you're only young, there's plenty of time for all of that'. Not that I am saying that this advice isn't true, because it might be in the long run. Still, when you break up with someone, no matter how old you are, it can still be very hurtful and seem to take over your life at the time.

The same goes for lots of other different relationships.Sometimes, talking to your parents might be difficult for lots of different reasons. Either you feel like you're speaking a different language or you're not speaking at all! You might be having problems with your best mate and feel that you've lost one of your biggest supporters! Are you being bullied or do you feel like you are completely on your own? Is someone close to you experiencing problems with drugs or alcohol….or are you? Are you confused about sex or sexuality? Do you find it difficult to make friends or are your friends making you feel uncomfortable or pressuring you?

Now I don't want to depress you !:-) You might not be experiencing any of the issues above. The point is that growing older isn't just about moving up a year and taking exams! There are loads of other things that might not have anything to do with careers or school work, that seem to be taking up a lot of your time and seem unavoidable! This is another area that Connexions aims to help young people with.

'Relationships' can involve lots of different things including :-

Boyfriends and girlfriends
Friends / friendship problems
Bullying
Parents / divorce and separation of their own relationship
Family conflict (arguments, violence or bad behaviour)
Racism, homophobia and prejudice
Sexual health, sexual relationships and sexuality
Peer pressure (pressure from friends)
Adoption and tracing your parents / family
Bereavement (a close friend or relative has died)
Relationships on line - Are you being safe?
Supporting people - Are you looking after everyone else?
Uncomfortable relationships - do you feel pressured to be around person/s who you're not sure about?

The most important thing to remember is that if you are having a relationship or know about a relationship where yourself or another person is being hurt or treated badly, you should speak to someone as soon as possible and get some help. Lots of information and advice is available to help you find the right people to talk to and your safety is always the most important thing.

There is lots of information available both online and through your Connexions advisers and centres. You can also talk to advisers at school, in your local centres or through Connexions Direct (see previous article). Relationships are often difficult or embarrassing to talk to people (especially strangers) about and you might therefore like to take advantage of using a service such as Connexions Direct where you can have 'non face-to-face' contact. In the following months we will also look at some of the above issues in more detail through further articles.

Web Links

http://www.youngscot.org/channels/relationships/

http://www.mindbodysoul.gov.uk/emotional/emomenu.html

http://www.connexions-direct.com/

Good Luck
Jennie Glitherow

At school or college? Look out for Jennie's future articles which we'll have here for the first Monday of each month, and which we'll link to the best sites we can find on the Web. Why not bookmark us now?

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